Eat-rotica

Malaysians love our food. So much so that we declare international warfare on rights to the Chilli Crab as well as Penang Laksa’s rightful throne on the top 10 list.

We love food so much that we compile them from lands far away, Malaysianise them and serve them 24 hours a day. Whether it’s roti canai, dim sum or nasi padang, Malaysians have made it accessible to everyone at any time of day. ‘Cause that’s how we roll, homie.

It helps that we’re a melting pot of cultures oozing with flavors. There’s always a reason, and there’s always enough time set aside to makan.

But lately food has started to annoy me. Not food per se, but food channels. Suddenly everyone’s a connoisseur. Simple pot luck events now turn into Iron Chef Battle Stadium where people around you start scrutinising how Jamie or Nigella would’ve done a better job than Auntie Sally on that lasagne dish she just brought.

And has anyone actually noticed that the License To Grill guy only has white friends?

Food channels are a conundrum in itself, confusing me to choose between eating more healthily with leaner cuisines, or whack that steak recipe from Tyler’s Ultimate. One day I’m out buying fresh organic vegetables and the next day I’m loading four cheese mix onto my home made enchilada.

And don’t even get me started on amateur foodography. But perhaps there really are some of us out there who really gives a toss about what his friends and family are having for dinner on Monday night.

Once upon a time ago, food was as good as the love and commitment put into it. A dash of pretentiousness and a sprinkle of superficiality was not required to make it any more tastier than it originally was. Maybe that’s why Nasi Lemak Antarabangsa never made it as a swanky franchise.

But you gotta love how Malaysians are also doing the opposite on things though. The art of Malaysianising are making foreign foods gerai-worthy.  Like how your local burger bakar tastes much better than Old Timer at Chilli’s, or how Melawati Kebabs can run circles on Hadramawt. And who can ever dispute the burger daging special cheese when it comes to Malaysianising the West at its best.

It never amazes me on how we manage to take something and enable it to fit snugly into our uniquely ironic Malaysian culture, and we have never stopped doing it from generations before, and hopefully for generations to come.

But in the meantime, please steer clear of the dismal performances of our amateur chefs on Masterchef Malaysia in my opinion. Aunty Sally will be very offended. Because they got nothin’ on her secret mee kari recipe. ‘nuff said.