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Thursday, May 7, 2009

Mano a Mano



There's this theory that time and space can be bent. And, if bent at a 180 degree angle, you get to see yourself, just in a parallel plane. If you adjust the angles, you can manipulate time and space to see the past, and possibly, the future. This can be verified by Denzel Washington, as evident in his misadventures in Deja Vu - if any of you wish to know further about this opening remark more than giving a toss to read where this is all actually leading to.


So, say you had this uncanny ability to manipulate time and space albeit the nerdy costume and gay superhero name. What would it be like? With a twist of your left and right hands, you somehow work the angles and voila, you're standing face to face with the previous you, and the future you.


Previous Me would be the one that freaks out the most, first.


Current Me would then turn to Previous Me and hug him ever so tightly, screaming phrases like "I miss you!" and "Take me back with you!" or bawling out " Don't ever leave me again!".


Then Previous Me starts kicking me in the ass, screaming out "What did you do to me?!?" or "How could you!?!!".


But suddenly, Previous Me will notice a few things that he missed out on all the commotion.


Parked in the garage is a magnificent steel stallion, idly sleeping in turbine slumber, with bared nostrils and 4 nose rings oozing out of its own charisma of dur technik, that has been versprunged.


And at the front door a beautiful lady with adoring eyes and a sunshine of comfort and heart.


And in her arms, happiness, joy and beauty bundled in a tiny human being's body.


Previous me starts to think "Dude, this is not so bad after all".


And Current Me picks himself up from the floor and brushes him off. "Yeah, you know what? You're right. This is way better than what you got going on over there...kinda" (points to 43 degree angle of warped time and space of 2002, where some Kampung Baru mongoloids were dancing on the podium in Bar Ibiza, dancing to Beyonce).


And both of them will turn to Future Me. "Let's see what you have on your side, old man".


"I can't show you." he says.


"But I'll tell you all about it over a few brewskies, gents."


And we'll talk and talk all night till the wee hours of the early morning.


Contented and pleased with ourselves, we all adjourn.


Previous Me goes away to find a chick with an apartment to crash at.


Future Me goes back to his house just in time to catch his son crawling back from his night out.


And Current Me goes back to change fresh diapers and kissing his sleeping wife goodnight, and thanking God for what he had, he wouldn't have had it any other way. And for what he has, to hold them tightly and never let go. And for all that's destined to come his way, to be true to who he was, that made him who he is, and will lead him to who he will be.