The Secret Affair I've Been Having With Bad Music

The rockin’ soundtrack of my life never really comes with a rockin’music video. This is because underneath this seemingly manly exterior, lies a Pop Diva.

And I know there are a lot more like me out there. We walk amongst you. Undetected. A side kept so secretly away from anybody and everybody, that even our parents don’t know. Nor our girlfriends. Or wives. And in many cases as well, not even our (gasp) buddies.

But we exist, people like me. Leading a despicable double life. Unfaithful not only to the people who know us, but more dastardly, to ourselves.

Yet there’s twinkle in my eye everytime I ended up having a go at it. It’s a drug like nothing else can fulfil. A rush of euphoria everytime I get a fix.

But it’s time to confess. Come out of hiding. To stand up and not be afraid of being judged, or ridiculed. To live free of guilt and expose my torrid secret affair with music:

1. Janet Jackson’s Rhythm Nation always made me feel like dancing. And the track Black Cat made me feel like a dangerous man.

2. I used to think Marky Mark and The Funky Bunch was really badass.

3.  I could never resist singing along to Eternal Flame.

4.  I practiced how to say miggedymiggedymigeddymiggedymack really fast.

5. I learnt how to play Now And Forever on the guitar, and sang to myself, imagining I was singing to my crush. For many, many nights.

6.  I harmonize to S Club 7 and N*Sync in the car

7.  I had a Ronan Keating CD in my car for 2 years. And I sang to them. Mimicking his voice. Complete with slight Irish accent.

8.  I sing duet songs in the car, and sing the female parts as well. In falsetto.

9. I never really liked Katy Perry’s songs. But I like Katy Perry’s music videos. I like Katy Perry in Katy Perry’s music videos.

10. Anuar Zain songs makes me want to love and respect women.

I’m sure we all have our deep dark relationship with music. Whether it’s the way they make you feel inside or the way they move you on the outside.

But as Bob Marley puts it, “One good thing about music, when it hits you, you feel no pain”

Even if it means clenching your fists like Brian Litrell when you’re belting out the bridge of “All I Have To Give”during that traffic standstill on the KESAS. Let the music move you.  Have those sweet, secret affair moments.

After all, Marky Mark and The Funky Bunch knows that it’s such a good vibration. It’s such a sweeeeeeet sensation-o-o-on.

Badass.